Snakey Daze

I had one of life's little adventures while golfing today. On the ninth and final hole, I put my first shot into the pond that protects the front of the green. I hit a horrible second shot that ended up in a ditch along the right side of the fairway. The groundsman had earlier used the weedeater in the ditch and it was still full of the cuttings.

I expected that the ball would be lost under those clippings, but I took a look anyway. I didn't see my ball, but I saw what appeared to be two crossed sticks in the grass. A closer look caused me to suspect one of those things wasn't a stick, but a rather large snake about 1 1/2 inches in diameter and nearly three feet in length.

I watched it for a minute or so seeing no sign of movement. I began to think perhaps it was dead. I called my partner over and he took a look. Still no movement from the snake. The groundsman was mowing nearby, and we waved him over. He took his look, but the vitality of our slithery friend was still indeterminate. The groundsman reluctantly poked at it from behind with a stick. It was not deceased! It didn't move far, however.

Since none of us knew the sort of creature we had on our hands and because of its fairly large dimensions, we decided a speedy termination was in order. While my partner and I maintained our observation of the serpent, nine-irons in hand, the groundsman fetched a shovel. Upon his return, he made short work of the beast.

If any of you find the demise of this snake upsetting, I'm sorry, but as for me, the only good snake is a dead snake.